All Gussied Up

As promised the pictures from our night out. We got to Jonquil and Scott's house around 5:30 and stayed and played with Mia until about 6:15. We said our good byes and then left. We were ok. I actually didn't cry, which surprised me because I have never been away from Mia for longer than an hour and Mia was with Jenny. We called 10 minutes after we left and they said everything was okay and Mia was fine. Then we called about 20 minutes later and they said Mia was okay still. Finally about 9:00 we called and they said that Mia was tired and sad. They said that she didn't cry, but was looking for us and getting fussy. Jenny still hadn't gotten her award so I immediately left and Jenny stayed behind to get her award. When I got to Mia she clung to me and laid her head on the shoulder. I packed up and left. When we got home we played and I kept her up with us until we went to be at 11. She usually goes to bed at 8, but I knew she wouldn't go to bed without me. We had a really rough night and I could tell that she was really upset with me. She hit me and pushed me away, and she hasn't done that since we first got home. Today has been better, but I think we may be in for another rough night. I hope I haven't done something that will affect our bond. Who knows? Being a parent means feeling guilty about everything and second guessing yourself. Maybe she is too dependent on me, because we spend 24 hours a day together. Maybe we shouldn't be co-sleeping. Maybe I shouldn't have went last night. Maybe this and maybe that......who knows?